Saturday, June 19, 2010


My Brianne and my Ryan. She's 18, he's 16. They are my younger two and they are the ones who help me feel very young on some days and very old on others. The red head has a red mouth because he was feasting on Doritos; probably because there was "no food" in the house. The blue eyed blonde was excited and happy, forcing brother to smile, because she was officially finished with that dreadful place called high school. I, the mother, had no problem smiling. I've had enough of the drama that comes along with high school girls, particularly bipolar ones whose mothers are also that way. All these years of oldest son is almost 27...have me feeling like, "OKAY, may I have a REST now?" It's not that I didn't/don't enjoy mothering, it's just that my children don't always enjoy being mothered. I did say mothered, not smothered. I remember how I was as a teen. I just wanted to have fun, no responsibility and everything on my terms and under my control. But I was very quiet about what and how I wanted things. How do you balance teaching your children to be responsible, respectful AND how to rest!? When they get to this age, they're being pulled in different directions from different people for different reasons. My heart needs an adjustment. They are still children, my children. But not really. Ouch.

Friday, June 11, 2010

The Flip Side of Pride of Ownership

After purchasing an item, no matter what it is or where it came from, I take care of it. Whether it needs to be watered, polished, loved on, cleaned, placed in the sunlight or shade, tucked into a corner, set on a table, parked in the farthest parking spot away from all other vehicles, I make it my pleasure and duty to see that it will last for as long as possible! I believe this is Pride of Ownership.
It can, however, turn into something ugly. I can become paranoid, selfish. Like, "No food allowed in this car!" "NO passing gas in this car!" No neighbors' tennis balls, baseballs, footballs, golfballs or hockey pucks are welcome in my yard; they might break the new windows! Don't leave crusty, gooey, staining messes on the counters or furniture; it might never come off! Don't drop my camera or touch the lens; I can't just run out and buy a new one!!! Don't trample on my flowers; I JUST bought them! Don't sneeze on the computer or pick your nose and then type on MY laptop's keyboard; I don't like germs and don't want to get sick!!! Eeewww! Don't put YOUR dog outside and leave all the droppings for ME to clean up. That's disgusting and I have already spent the better part of a lifetime cleaning up people messes and animal messes. It's YOUR turn. { ; Ah yes, pride of ownership. How does that relate to the church and the ministries that people claim to be their's??? Have you been overly involved because you wanted to think it was your "baby"? Or have you been involved because you simply wanted to be there? Or have you been involved because you had your arm twisted and you couldn't say no? So now. Where is your Holy Spirit? Is He sitting around out on the curb? The Holy Spirit says to be loving, truthful, joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, good, faithful, gentle and to have self-control. By letting the Holy Spirit who is in you, LIVE through you, you will be living the evidence that He is really there. There is something to be said for taking care of what you have, whether it be things or ministries. Let God do His best through you with your capabilities that He gave you, and let go of the selfish grip.